on the guitar his world shuts down, its just him standing above everyone else. he could be on stage, on the moon, a shooting star, but he's playing. The guitar in his hands he's someone else. Naturally songs flow from him, every now and then he looks down reminded I am watching him. It's powerful watching him. How could everyone not want him love him need him as I do. Nothing could take me from him. He's so perfect and this just proves it.

So my baby recently had a birthday. I decided he needed a huge party. But it turned out none of his brothers could come visit! I had to do something to make this special b/c recently we've been fighting and I had made a HUGE BOOBOO! so I come up w/ a great plan! STRIP CLUB! I thought what better place to take a guy. So we get there and get some drinks then we go over to the strip club. The girls were HOTT! We even got some tattoos while we were out. He got some work done on an old one on his back, and I got a heart w/ a halo hanging on the right w/ "his" written in the middle and i put it on my wrist. It was completely great! We had the greats night ever. I wish it was my birthday b/c it was the great party ever! His brothers are sure to be sorry they missed it. He had the greatest smile on his face all night. I'm glad I made it specail for him! xoxox Tara

When do you know when enough is enough? When can you tell if you're heart has had it. I know he loves me. After 4 years he should. But I am 22 I am not an old dried up women. I need affection, sometimes I just want to scream at him that i can have other men, that guys do still find me cute. I know how to flirt and to act weepy and needy. But that would hurt him. Do you know what the fuck he said to me? No, No... no you could never guess. When I told him what Angie said about him talking about her all the time at work to Jon and I asked him why must he talk about other girls. he has me... He says, If it wasnt her it would be someone else. SOMEONE ELSE. He has to have someone else. Always... Then I am here alone taking care of our 3 kids and he's hunting or fishing or taking care of this and that. I want him to want me. I need to feel like I am the most important thing in his life and if the smallest thing in life was making me unhappy he would tear it to pieces and stomp all over it... but that doesnt happen. Do you know why? Because he must not care anymore. Do you know what he recently told me. That when we first started dating he didnt care about me... He wanted out of rehab. Yes I am that much of a loser. He said after a while he started to love me. That makes me feel like a total jerk. I'm the one who feels like a jerk thats funny right? Sure it is. When we first started dating he hated that Brandy was favored over me. That daddy had bought her a new Durango and then turned around and traded it for the new Civic. He told me he was going to take me a way and take care of me. Well thanks a fucking lot for taking me away from my Mommy who loves me w/ all her heart and my Daddy who tries to do everything for me so you could bring me away to not love me. YES NOT LOVE ME. B/c when you're in love you want to hold that person. You want to kiss them. You want them to know they are the ONLY ONES in ur life. Not the easiest thing. If I left he would move some other bitch in here to take my place. So WHAT I DONT LIKE TO CLEAN??? Whats the big fucking deal REALLY? I need him to love me, and to make me feel like his one and only again... And if he doesnt realize he's losing me soon it may all be to late b/c a girl can only take so much. When the bad times start to out weigh the good ones, run. Thats what I was told, and here lately the bad times are sworming. Its not the money or the kids. Its us. I want him to look at me w/ love not hate or disgust. Yes disgust I feel like I am disgusting to him. How did I get myself in to such a place. How can a man just stop loving you

well he's home, and I feel alot better. I dont think he knows anything more about what happen to him then when he went in there. I think thats a little scary for him. anyways. I just wanted to let everyone know my babies home. I can sleep again. Love always Tara

FRIENDS: Will stand guard while u take a piss.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Will shine a spotlight on you while your drunk ass is taking a piss in the bushes.
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FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Call your parents drunk as hell and tell them about the fat chick you tried to pick up
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FRIENDS: Hope the night out drinking goes smoothly, and hope that no one is late for the ride home.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Know some wild shit will happen, and set up rally points.
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FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Will be sitting next to you saying, Damn...that shit was fun "
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FRIENDS: Cry with you.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Laugh at you
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FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Steal each other's stuff so often nobody remembers who bought it in the first place.
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FRIENDS: Are happy that someone picked up a one night stand and leave them alone.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Will Crawl naked into the room with a camera and hope for the tag team.
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FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Could write a book with direct quotes from you.
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FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.
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FRIENDS: Would knock on your door.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, "I'm home!"
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FRIENDS: Will try and talk to the bouncer when you get tossed out of the bar.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Will buck up and go after the bouncer for touching you on the way out.
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FRIENDS: Will wish you had enough money to go out that night, and are sorry you couldn't come.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Will share their last dollar with you, drag you along, and try to steal free drinks for you all night long.
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FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "You better drink the rest of that shit, you know we
don't waste. That's alcohol abuse!!!" HAHAHAHA !!!!
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FRIENDS: Want the money they loaned you back next week.

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Can't begin to remember who owes who money after taking care of each other for so long.
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FRIENDS: Will say "I can't handle Tequila anymore".

MISSOURI FRIENDS: Will say "okay, just one more..." and then 2 minutes later "okay, just one more!".
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FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.

MISSOURI FRIENDS Will knock them the Fuck out!!
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FRIENDS: Will ignore this

MISSOURI FRIENDS Will re-post this to ALL of their KICKASS MISSOURI FRIENDS